Collapse into the dark and empty

Endless regret.

I know it’s not my fault

But I can’t seem to grab it.

The truth is far too hard to understand

When I know that if I hadn’t

It would still be the same.

I’m trying hard to make it go away

But everything reminds me

And I can’t let go.

I know I have to let you be

And that’s what kills me.

I want to call you

Write to you

To see how you are doing.

Are you as fucked up as I am

Or is it nice to be alone?

I miss you so damn much

And I don’t want this anymore.

I want to be with you

And I hate that I have to be strong.

My friends and family are helping a lot

But none of them are you.

You made me feel better than ever

When we were together

And when we were apart

I wanted you there with me.

Before

I was always independent

But now

I long for you.

I need to not be alone

Ever

Cause when I am I start thinking of you

And how we should be together

How we would be great

If we were just on the same level.

I’m hoping that some day you will see

How good it could be

If it was you and me.

I love you.

I miss you.

I need you.